Bed and breakfast.

• I've always heard from other guys that these B&B places were a beating. And what do I know? I'd been to one exactly ONCE before, on my wedding night, and that was only courtesy of my best friend and his wife. That B&B was nice, but I was at the time a little irritated to have to leave the best party that I'd ever been to, to go to it, with rice still in my hair. I had threatened to change clothes and go back, but was told that it simply Wasn't Done.
  
  On that first occasion, after certain basic formalities of nuptuality were attended to, we didn't have much to do but watch some TV. Rowan Atkinson had a decent wordless physical comedy routine that we laughed out, and we turned in fairly early.
  
  That next morning, we awoke on the first new morning as a married couple to a quiet knock at the door. In the hallway outside the door we found a tray with great huge banana chocolate muffins and a coffee service on it. We went downstairs an hour later for strada and friendly conversation, before going home to my house.
  
  I hadn't paid for it, but had generally enjoyed myself.
  
  This weekend, we celebrated the 11th anniversary of my marriage, and I arranged for my parents to watch my kids. I then surprised my wife with a trip to Big City and a downtown B&B. After checking in, my wife and I went and had the most marvelous lobster bisque at a restaurant that I like, before raiding a bookstore, catching a movie, hitting the bookstore again, and having a late supper. We got back to the Bed & Breakfast shortly before midnight.
  
  The next morning, we went refreshed to the dining room, where we had a savory strada and some frickin' INCREDIBLE fresh apple muffins.
  
  Conclusions?
  
  --Bed and Breakfasts are NOT a beating. It's a combination of my two favorite things. Seriously, throw in "long-range plinking with large-bore pistols," and you'd have the trifecta.
  --Strada is a standard at these places, evidently, both in sweet and savory formats.
  --Muffins are way better within the walls of a B&B. You simply will never eat a better muffin, anywhere. I expect to have loving dreams about those muffins.
  --Plan your entertainment, and have it nearby, for the evening before, and the day after.
  
  I doubt that we'll wait another 11 years (to the day!) to patronize another one.