I've Got A Lot To Be Thankful For.
Actually, I've a private car or two. I've got carpet on the floors which I want it on, and hardwood and slate and tile on the floors where I don't. I never wanted caviar, and while I enjoy tacking a sailboat across a lake, I'd probably bore of much yachting, so who wants a yacht? Not me. :)
In addition to that, I do in fact bear a resemblance to old Bing (well, Irving Berlin, actually) in that:
Problems coming up with gravy? Canned or bottled is unacceptable. It doesn't have to be hard.
Get a 3 to 4 quart sauce pan. Coarsely dice some onion and celery and crush some garlic in some butter in the pan, and saute it with the turkey neck and giblets until the onions and the meat begin to brown. Pour in a half cup of dry white wine and reduce. Pour in a can of broth, and reduce. While that's going on, pour off some of your turkey drippings out of the pan into a large tumbler, and decant the grease off the top. Discard the grease and keep the drippings underneath. Strain that into your sauce pan, and reduce some more. Be sure to fork that turkey neck to encourage the whole thing along. You will probably want to reduce a second can of broth before straining all the solids out, and then thicken with flour.
Afraid of lumps? Don't be! Just take a tall glass and a fork, and put a quarter-cup of water into it, and slowly add a couple of tablespoons of flour to the water while rapidly stirring it into the water, to make a consistent slurry, before slowly stirring it into the simmering gravy stock. Stir it in well, keeping in mind that it will thicken more after cooling. Keep stirring and simmering for at least 5 minutes to get rid of the slight pasty flavor. (15 is better, but you're probably busy. Use your eager young helper to stir, and demand that they not leave their post.) Salt and pepper to taste just before serving.
Voila! Homemade turkey gravy that you don't have to apologize to anyone over.
Okay, friends: in 50 words or less, describe this year's turkey and dressing at your house. Baked, smoked, fried? Eggs in your dressing? Chestnuts? Do you call it "dressing" or "stuffing?" Oysters? Cornbread? Too much sage? Lemme hear your preference, and what you went with.