Note to would-be mass-shooters:

Well, for the umpteenth time, it's happened again.

One of y'all has decided to Make A Statement before eating his gun.

Here's an idea-- rather than burn in Hell or whatever actually passes for it in your soul kingdom (you like that? I just made that up), why don't you just publish a nice advertisement in the New York Times or your local paper, then call a news conference, make your statement, and then eat your gun.

See where we're cutting out the middle man? I mean, by not going into a mall, or a lecture hall, or a church, or a school cafeteria, or a Luby's, you actually get to:
a) get much more control over the nature of the outcome of your little "woe is me" stunt, and
b) not kill strangers, some of whom happen to be very nice and send flowers to their mothers on their birthdays.

Just a thought. I mean, really: do you really, REALLY think you're going to finish the thing without a bullet breathmint? If you think about it, that's where you were going to take this anyway, right?

So if your plan all along is to make a spectacle of yourself in your death, do us all a favor, and do the right thing.