Better And Better

If you don't draw yours, I won't draw mine. A police officer, working in the small town that he lives in, focusing on family and shooting and coffee, and occasionally putting some people in jail.

Monday, October 31, 2011

Random Halloween Day Thoughts.

  • --The Eighth Grader In The House carved up a jack-o'-lantern that was better than any that I've done in 40 years. My wife, a sculptor, was impressed. Not fancy; just well-executed. I don't have a picture because the effect is lost without darkness and a candle, and I forgot to take one last night.
  • --I still need to finish cleaning guns from Blogorado. Next year we should put together a gun-cleaning table to sit and chat at while cleaning guns at the end.
  • --While working the crosswalk during the city-sponsored Halloween event this weekend, my partner and I wondered how else girls would learn to dress up as sluts in public, if they didn't have their hot moms to show them how at Halloween.
  • --Yard decorations for Halloween have gotten out of hand. I don't think Christmas-style strings of orange house lights were even seen before about two or three years ago. Now they're ubiquitous.  Front yard graveyards are thick on the ground. Stupid inflatable fabric lighted yard decorations? All over.
  • --My daughters are terrified that I'm going to wear my kilt and pith helmet while accompanying them and their pack of friends trick-or-treating this evening. I've let them believe that I'm going to. Talk about the scariest thing that they can think of on Halloween! Heh.
  • --While in the front yard spattering stage blood (left over from my graduate studies) onto the white lace garage sale dress that The Fourth Grader In The House was wearing, I thought to myself that the greater horror for me was seeing my kid in a bridal gown.
  • --My younger daughter, while standing outside with the blood drying on her bridal gown, saw the cat playing with a mouse. She tried to save the mouse, and got bitten for her trouble. Didn't break the skin, and the mouse was healthy as could be. I told her that she was lucky that I got to see the rodent, or I would have her getting shots. Do they still do that? I also threatened her with a thrashing if she ever again tried to touch a wild animal of any stripe. I killed the mouse, which did have a broken back already. The cat looked at me disgustedly, and ate it.
  • --My elder daughter dressed in black, painted her nails, eyes, and lips black, wore a giant silver cross and a chain belt, and made her face white, and went as a Goth Girl. She practiced sighing and rolling her eyes as she announced, "Trick or treat" in a voice dripping with irony.
  • --My neighbor thought that it was AWESOME when I put Burglar Bob, the reactive shooting dummy, on the front porch. He liked it even better when I put the words "Free Candy" on my skeevy old van parked out front. I took some pictures, and then chickened out. I gotta work in this town.
  • --At the last second I had to run get some candy. The door hasn't been knocked on yet.
  • --I should probably fix that doorbell.

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At Monday, October 31, 2011 9:42:00 PM, Blogger Josh K. said...


At Tuesday, November 01, 2011 5:44:00 AM, Blogger Farmmom said...

I want pics :D

At Tuesday, November 01, 2011 8:01:00 AM, Blogger Tam said...

"She practice sighing and rolling her eyes as she announced, "Trick or treat" in a voice dripping with irony. "

That is full of win, right there. :)

At Tuesday, November 01, 2011 10:12:00 AM, Blogger Matt G said...

You got pics already, FM!

At Tuesday, November 01, 2011 10:13:00 AM, Blogger Matt G said...

Urk. Not full of win, 'til I correct the typo.

At Tuesday, November 01, 2011 6:00:00 PM, Blogger Old NFO said...

Love it :-)

At Wednesday, November 02, 2011 10:36:00 AM, Blogger Nancy R. said...

Love the idea of the van with the sign. Heheh.


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